Ans. It is a directive of the Guru for every Sikh to recite the ‘Sohila’ at the time of going to bed.
Also according to Guru’s commandment the ‘Sohila’ should be recited and a supplication said at the time of cremation of the dead body. From this parallelism one could understand that death is a long slumber and sleep is a short death.
A man or a maid servant takes the children for playing. If and when the parents take their children back, the servants do not cry. On the contrary they consider that they have been relieved from the load of their responsibility. Similarly, when someone goes back into the lap of God (the Father), the crying of his/her parents and relatives is inappropriate. This (human) body is not everlasting while the soul is indestructible. One should always remember that whatever God has made to happen, is for our good.The Guru has made it clear to the Sikh that nothing is lost when this pot (body) breaks. The purpose for which the body stayed alive will continue to live:
ਘਟ ਫੂਟੇ ਘਟਿ ਕਬਹਿ ਨ ਹੋਈ॥
(SGGS, P. 340)
“Even when the pitcher (body) bursts, he (soul) does not diminish”.
A Sikh must always stay ready for death (which can come any time). He is to go to the realm of truth (God) with a smile rather than a doubt in his mind. According to Gurbani:
ਤੁਝ ਹੀ ਕੀਆ ਜੰਮਣ ਮਰਣਾ॥
ਗੁਰ ਤੇ ਸਮਝ ਪੜੀ ਕਿਆ ਡਰਣਾ॥
(SGGS, P. 1022)
“I have understood from the Guru that You (O God) have created birth as well as death. So why should I be afraid (of death)”?
When several of his close associates passed away, Guru Har Gobind had said, “A Giaani (one who has spiritual knowledge) does not get overjoyed on meeting his friends and associates nor he grieves on separating from them”.
At Damdama Sahib when Mata Sundri, the consort of Guru. Gobind Singh, did not see the four sons (Sahibzadas) in the congregation, she expressed her grief aloud. Then the Tenth Master said, “Why do you feel grieved so much? This world is like meeting of various streams. They meet and again get separated. The sons were the gifts of God bestowed on us and they gave their lives for Dharma and left as the Lord willed”.
This is the reason why at Golden Temple Amritsar, an Akhand Paath (not stop recitation of Guru Granth Sahib), in memory of a deceased, cannot be performed.
For the same reason the Sikhs do not use the term ‘dying’.We call it “Akaal Chalaana” (proceeding towards the Timeless, God), going to the realm of Truth or becoming complete, or simply passing away. In the Sikh code (Rehit Maryada) it is specified that at the time of death the Hindu rituals like taking the (dying) person down from the bed (and putting him/her on the floor) or placing an earthen lamp on his/her chest must not be performed. Having the dying person touch a valuable item like a cow and giving it away in charity is also not allowed. No chore that goes against the directives of the Guru should be performed. These include screaming and wailing in different ways or beating the chest etc. Only recitation of Gurbani (Hymns from Guru GranthSahib) or repeating the ‘Shabad’ Waheguru and saying thank You O Lord, is advised. If someone comes to condole, he/she should only say, ” it was God’s Will” and then sit down. (Prem Sumaarag).
Irrespective of the age of the deceased his/her body should be cremated. However, where arrangements for cremation cannot be made, the body could be disposed off by putting in water or any other suitable means, without bringing any doubts in mind.
Also the time of cremation is immaterial (could be day or night).
The body should be bathed and clad in fresh clothes. Then it should be laid on a (suitable) board and a supplication for departure to be said. In the supplication to God the following words are appropriate to be said: “Your Sikh, O Lord, completed the breaths that You had granted to him/her and is now departing. Kindly grant him/her permanent abode close to Your lotus feet”.The Tenth Master had said that saying of the supplication was necessary for the peace of the departed soul. Since the soul, being that of a Sikh, had already attained such peace by listening Gurbani, only this much should be sufficient to say (kindly give the departed soul a permanent abode close to Your feet and bestow upon the family the capacity to abide by Your Will).Then the funeral procession should proceed to the cremation ground. All along hymns from Guru Granth Sahib, which concern the subject of death and renunciation, should be recited (or Waheguru and Satt Naam chanted). On reaching the crematorium a funeral pyre should be built. Before the pyre is set on fire a supplication should be said and then the body placed on the pyre. A son or any other relative or friend of the deceased should then set it on fire. The people accompanying the funeral procession should sit at a distance in the form of a congregation and sing hymns of renunciation. As the pyre lights up, ‘Sohila’ should be recited at the end of which a supplication is said. No ‘Kapaal’ ritual (the breaking of an earthen pitcher) is to be performed. Everyone should then go to a Gurdwara and starta ‘Paath’ (reading of complete Guru Granth Sahib) for the peace of the departed soul. After reciting six stanzas of ‘Anand Sahib’, Karhah Prasaad should be distributed.
The reading of Guru Granth Sahib should preferably be completed in ten days. However, if that is not possible then another day should be fixed for the ‘Bhog’, according to the convenience of the relatives. All members of the family and relatives should try to take part in the reading of Guru Granth Sahib. If possible, Kirtan (hymn singing) should be conducted every evening during this period. After this ceremony on the tenth day (or any other day) no other rituals or ceremony need be performed.
After the funeral pyre has cooled down, the ashes should be collected and put in a river or sea, or buried at a suitable place and the ground leveled. Building or erecting of a memorial at the cremation place, or the place where ashes are buried, is prohibited.
Performance of any other meaningless rituals like resting the body halfway to the crematorium, breaking of an earthen pitcher, wailing and/or beating of chest, lighting of an earthen lamp or having a feast annually in the memory of the deceased, are prohibited.
To pick certain bones from the funeral pyre and taking them to river Ganges or Pataal Puri etc. to put them in the river is self directed and is prohibited.
These days many crematoriums have electric or gas furnaces, therefore there is no need to build the pyre.